Gluten-Free Shrimp and Turnip Delight: A Bloody Masterpiece

Gluten-Free Shrimp and Turnip Delight: A Bloody Masterpiece
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What Started it all:
Shrimp, Turnip, baking soda, blender

Listen up, you donkey bums! Today, we're going to cook a bloody fantastic gluten-free dish that'll make your taste buds sing. And, for God's sake, don't even think about screwing it up!

Ingredients

  • 1 pound large shrimp, peeled and deveined
  • 2 medium turnips, peeled and chopped
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 blender (don't even think about using a crap blender, or I'll come after you with a rolling pin!)

Instructions

  1. Get your bloody act together! Preheat your oven to 400°F (200°C).
  2. [Cracks knuckles] In a blender (yes, a bloody blender!), blend the chopped turnips until they're smooth as silk. Don't leave any chunks, you numpty!
  3. In a large bowl, mix together the blended turnips, baking soda, and a pinch of salt. Yes, a pinch! Don't overdo it, you dimwit!
  4. [Taps foot impatiently] Add the shrimp to the bowl and toss to coat. Make sure they're evenly coated, or I'll send you packing!
  5. [Slams fist on counter] Line a baking sheet with parchment paper and arrange the shrimp in a single layer. Drizzle with a bit of olive oil, but don't drown them, you bloody amateur!
  6. Get it in the oven! Roast for 12-15 minutes, or until the shrimp are pink and cooked through.
  7. [Folding arms] Serve hot, garnished with chopped fresh parsley or chives, if you're not a complete muppet.

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